This thesis is a collection of poems which were written between 2011 and 2017. Much of my earliest work is in this collection, though, most all of it has been heavily revised over the years. The content of this collection begins with seven poems that address the death of my best friend and brother, Jon. These were some of the most difficult poems for me to write but ultimately, I found that the process, though intense, was cathartic. The rest of the collection addresses themes regarding class, place, substance abuse, mental health; including but not limited to: suicidal ideation, depression, family, social structure, politics, and anger. A great deal of the content is dark and melancholic in mood and moves through very deep depression at points. A few relationships I've had are addressed and wrestled with and emerge as two separate apologies of sorts. I also wrestle with the idea of home and living on the west coast. The final poem, "Choose Life" was inspired by the film Trainspotting and I felt it served the collection to have a poem that is loosely comparable to a reprise that ends the thesis with a more positive outlook on life.