暢銷書是人們學習愛情資訊的重要管道，其內含有小說、散文與劇本等文類。它們不僅提供多樣的愛情論述，更是讀者吸收、學習愛情經驗的重要摹本。能夠出版暢銷書的作家們具備強烈的社會影響力與能見度，因此暢銷書反映了社會大眾的愛情觀念，同時也提供人們在愛情生活中該如何自處與面對愛情的生活倫理與準則。本研究亟欲透過暢銷書的研究來理解社會的主流愛情觀念，並從中分析出各種愛情困境的行動導引，最後將之統整並與社會理論家對話。為了研究愛情類的暢銷書，本研究以TPI暢銷排行榜(2004/1~2013/8)的資料作為取樣對象，並以暢銷度為首要考量後挑選適合書籍進行研究。根據研究發現，暢銷作家在許多方面與社會理論家看法一致。然而，暢銷作家比理論家專注於個人於愛情中所遭遇的困境，以及愛情困境所能實行的解決方案。愛情類暢銷書的論述呈現高度理性化、自我反思、自我實現等正向積極的現代性特徵，其中「愛自己」的論述更是它們對現代愛情的主要看法。對暢銷書而言，「愛自己」顯然是避免「浪漫愛陷阱」的最佳方式。暢銷書透過「愛自己」的論述將愛情理性化，並且從自我出發，重新建構正向積極的愛情心態。正是這種積極向上的論述重新建立起讀者對愛情的希望，並且成為讀者持續相信、進入愛情的重要原因。 / Bestselling books serve as the very way of getting love information. It contains novel, essay and drama kinds of literatures. They supply various love discourse to help readers to absorb and learn love experiences as such. Those who can publish best seller books are authors with strong social influence and visibility, therefore, books of these authors have the capacity of reflecting love ideas of general public and giving instructions for readers to deal love matters with ethical principles. The goal of the study is to use the best seller books to understand main stream ideas of love, summarizing instructions of hurdles in love and, finally, compile them into a compact form to discuss with theorists. In order to research best seller books of love, we choose the ranking list of best seller books in TPI (Taiwan Publisher Information) website as a target population to sample from, and using the degree of selling as the main sampling factor to select proper samples to research on. Based on our research findings, bestselling authors share same opinions with theorists in many aspects, however, bestselling authors are more focusing on personal struggles in love and the solutions that one can take to deal with. The discourse of best seller books present positive and active modernity portrait, for examples: highly rationalization, self-reflexivity and self-realization. Among these features, “Love Thyself”is the main concept of their way to perceive modern love. For best seller books, “Love Thyself”seems to be the best way to avoid “Traps of Romance” as such. Through the ideas of self-loving, best seller books is able to rationalize love with discourse and start from the point of self to re-construct positive and active mentality. It is from this positive and active discourse that readers can re-establish their hope to love and convince themselves to continually believe or enter into the sphere of love. Keywords: Best Selling Books, Sociology of Love, Reflexivity, Self-Love, Hope.