Anita Loos’ Gentlemen Prefer Blondes constantly acknowledges tensions between the intentions and actions of its protagonist, Lorelei Lee. Some literary critics and authors have speculated in depth the reasons and/or effects of Lorelei’s humorous oblivion, coming to the conclusion that Loos creates this character as a parody for the reader. This article asserts instead that readers should grant Lorelei autonomy, thus giving her more credit than she is generally given at face value. I read Blondes as a self-help book rather than a parody. Specifically, I read Lorelei as not only a creation of modernist work, but a creator of such work: her diary works as a satire on the nineteenth century social etiquette texts directed at women. By identifying some implicit lessons in Lorelei’s diary, I will demonstrate how Loos carefully constructs Lorelei’s humorous rhetoric as a disguised societal guide for the contemporary American flapper who aspires upward mobility.