Doctor of Philosophy / Most often, we encounter our first definitions of violence, abuse, and harm when we enter the work force, through some form of training or maybe posters. All of these definitions are created by other humans. Most of these definitions are created by lawyers or specialists. Most people take these definitions for granted – that they are accurate, never change, and act as a "cover-all". For example, if an action does not fit that specific definition, then the action is not violent or abusive. But, these ways of thinking do not line up with how people who have lived through violence and abuse define their experiences. Also, technology is rarely included in these definitions, despite our phones, computers, and other devices being constantly used to create and maintain relationships with others. Using stories told on Reddit, I create different definitions of harm, violence, and abuse that incorporate technology and capture these experiences more accurately. I then discuss additional ways of thinking about violence and abuse from other fields that offer different ways of understanding. I provide an example of this new kind of violence called follower weaponization, created through and with social media, before suggesting a few new ways of addressing violence and abuse beyond online training models that focuses on affordable housing, living wages, noncarceral response teams, and increasing access to childcare, transportation, community care, and mental health resources.