This is a qualitative study using ethnographic methods to collect data and critical autoethnography to reflect on my personal history in the light of what I learned about others (Anderson and Glass-Coffin, 2013; Ellis, 2009; Erickson, 2011; Manning and Adams, 2015; Rennel, 2015). My research focuses on race and culture in relation to perceptions in relationships, community, and education before and after urban renewal. I present my work in two-manuscripts: Growing Up White: I Didn't Know What I Didn't Know and Gainsboro: It's Just the Way Things Were. The first portion of the study looks at growing up in a White neighborhood in Roanoke, Virginia, during the early years of integration and the Civil Rights Movement, while being unaware of the existence of another world beyond my own. The second manuscript presents findings from interviews in the corresponding Black community and archival research interrogating systemic issues associated with urban renewal. / Doctor of Philosophy / In this study, I examine the effects of urban renewal on race and culture in a mid-sized southern city. My work focuses on individual perceptions about relationships, community, and education. The first portion of the study looks at growing up in a white neighborhood during the early years of integration and the Civil Rights Movement, while being unaware of the existence of another world beyond this one. The following section presents findings from interviews with residents in the corresponding Black community and research on issues associated with urban renewal.

In the life of Søren A. Kierkegaard “the instant” had two distinct meanings. The first use of the phrase “the instant” is the point of intersection of time and eternity. It is the split second of decision, and the flash of a personal revolutionizing vision: a decisive “glint of an eye” to live in the existential moment. However, The Instant was also the title of a broadsheet Kierkegaard published at the end of his life that directly attacked “Christendom” and the idea of a Christian Nation. Through a layered account using narrative vignettes, I examine how “instants” and Kierkegaard's The Instant impacted my ideas of identity, community, and Christianity, leading me to a place of exile.

There is an increase of White settler Child and Youth Care (CYC) practitioners who are questioning how to be useful in their attempts at solidarity and justice-doing amidst precarious ethics and tensions. Meanwhile, Indigenous women, girls, trans and two-spirit people are being murdered and taken (MMIWGT2S+) at genocidal rates with little action from Canadian government and RCMP. Drawing from critical race theory, intersectional feminism, and anti-oppressive praxis, this research traces my own path to justice-doing and solidarity exploring the concept of witnessing as a White settler. With a critical examination of self, Whiteness, and White supremacy, I attempt to answer the research questions: In what ways can witnessing function as a useful practice framework for White settler solidarity? Secondarily, how can art act as witness or co-conspirator? Using an arts-based critical autoethnography, this study combines personal narratives with arts-based reflections on researcher’s experience as White settler facilitator of the program Youth for Dignity on unceded Kaska territory in Watson Lake, Yukon. The research focuses on the creation of a collaborative art piece on MMIWGT2S+ to explore witnessing as one pathway for White settlers committed to social change. Building on the work of Vikki Reynolds (2010a, 2010b, 2012) and other literature on solidarity and witnessing, seven witnessing intentions that inform my White Settler Emerging Solidarity Practice surfaced from this research: (a) critical examination of self; (b) reciprocal and respectful relationships; (c) intersectionality; (d) embodied listening; (e) honouring resistance; (f) action; and (g) accountability. This research has the potential to provide a possible pathway for other CYC practitioners to engage with the complexities and tensions of White settler solidarity practice. / Graduate

Eldora, Neethi and Seraphina are three young women who work as science interpreters at a large metropolitan museum. Each woman began her tenure at the age of 15, as part of an employment program for low-income and minority youth, and have since grown to become leaders within the program. Using autoethnography (Ellis, 2004) and portraiture (Lawrence-Lightfoot and Hoffman Davis, 1997), I explore the rich cultures and histories that each woman brings to her work, present stories that counter the dominant deficit narratives around diversity in informal science education, and reflect on connections to my own practice. Through a critical pedagogy framework (McLaren, 2009; Kincheloe, 2008), I analyze power and privilege within the institution, and the roles that race, language, and culture play in the dynamics of the workplace. This includes examination of workplace microaggressions, physical barriers to cross-cultural interaction, and technocratic ideologies that limit advancement and sense of belonging. From facing subtle acts of racism to taking on life-changing opportunities for growth, I examine the complex relationships that the women have with the institution, and explore ways that they are becoming agents of change. / Ph. D.

This study explores teacher retention and teacher resilience in the United States through the stories of five teachers. The researcher presents the research in two manuscripts. Finding My Way through Teaching: A Critical Autoethnographic Play combines critical pedagogy (Freire, 1970) with autoethnography (Ellis, 2004) to examine the author's personal journey as a teacher in a private school, a public school, and a public school in Central America. The research is presented as a one-act play with scenes focusing on conversations with parents, principals, and students, along with scenes examining each situation that take the audience through the internal monologue of the researcher's decision making process to move schools, stay in a school, leave a school, and question their ability or willingness to return to K-12 schooling. Building Relationships: The Stories of Four Small Urban School Teachers shares the stories of four veteran elementary school teachers, teachers who have taught for more than five years, from Parker City Public Schools. This study uses a case study approach with recorded dialogic interviews as data (e.g., Kvale, 1996; Marshall and Rossman, 2011). The stories the teachers tell point to the importance of building and maintaining relationships with students, other teachers, and administration, as one of the key factors for overcoming the challenges of working in a small urban school division and one of the key factors for changing schools or remaining in a school throughout their careers. / Ph. D. / This study explores teacher retention and teacher resilience in the United States through the stories of five teachers. The researcher presents the research in two manuscripts: Finding My Way through Teaching: A Critical Autoethnographic Play and Building Relationships: The Stories of Four Small Urban School Teachers. In Finding My Way, the author uses critical autoethnography to examine their own journey as a teacher in a private school, a public school, and a public school in Central America. The findings are presented as a one-act play with scenes focusing on conversations with parents, principals, and students, along with scenes examining each situation , taking the audience through the internal monologue of the author’s decision making process to move schools, stay in a school, leave a school, and question their ability or willingness to return to K-12 schooling. In Building Relationships, the researcher shares the stories of four veteran elementary school teachers, teachers who have taught for more than five years, from Parker City Public Schools. This study uses a case study approach with recorded dialogic interviews as data. The stories the teachers tell point to the importance of building and maintaining relationships with students, other teachers, and administration, as one of the key factors for overcoming the challenges of working in a small urban school division and one of the key factors for changing schools or remaining in a school throughout their careers.

Since the beginning, U.S. public schools have perpetuated harm towards students that do not fall under the descriptors of male, middle/upper class, cis-gender, heterosexual, able-bodied, neurotypical, and white. Education scholars with varying ideological backgrounds have approached questions of education equity for decades; yet, in asking these questions through the "white gaze" (Wright, 2023), some scholars have perpetuated the harm they seek to demystify. The following series of manuscripts express the dire need for (re)calibrating U.S. public schools so that all children receive just, equitable, and humanizing education. The first manuscript analyzes harmful white supremacist ideological hegemony embedded in education policy, the second manuscript is an ethnographic portrait (Lawrence-Lightfoot and Davis, 1997) that resists the "white gaze" and illuminates the good in a thriving classroom comprised of Black and Brown teachers and students through a lens of Black feminist theory, and the third manuscript interrogates what it takes emotionally and intellectually to do this work as a white woman scholar who seeks ubuntu feminist solidarity. The dissertation concludes with a posture of hope. Hope of an otherwise world (Greene, 1995) of education in which ubuntu feminist scholarship will inform praxis so that students may experience pedagogies that liberate instead of harm. / Doctor of Philosophy / Since the beginning, U.S. public schools have perpetuated harm towards students that do not fall under the descriptors of male, middle/upper class, cis-gender, heterosexual, able-bodied, neurotypical, and white. Various types of education scholars have approached questions of education equity for decades; yet, in asking these questions some scholars have perpetuated the harm they seek to examine. The following series of manuscripts express the dire need for (re)calibrating U.S. public schools so that all children receive just, equitable, and humanizing education. The first manuscript analyzes problems and harms embedded in education policy, the second manuscript gives the reader a seat in the classroom of an educator that exemplifies liberatory pedagogy, and the third manuscript interrogates what it takes emotionally and intellectually to do this work as a white woman scholar. The dissertation concludes with a posture of hope. Hope of an otherwise world (Greene, 1995) of education in which collective feminist scholarship will inform teaching practice so that students may experience pedagogies that liberate instead of harm.

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