This critical autoethnographic exploration evolved following an initial curiosity concerning diversity of practice amongst (other) Lecturers when constructing feedback for mature undergraduate Registered Nurses. As an early exploration revealed that I was viewing my professional experiences as a learner and practitioner through a previously unacknowledged working class lens, I began to foreground personal experiences from which a more relational understanding of the intersecting nature of personal, professional and broader influences on practice has emerged. A reclaimed marginalised perspective provided an ethical direction for the research and for the development of a more nuanced understanding of feedback practice. Within this thesis, autobiographical writing, stories from practice and theory share a symbiotic and reciprocal relationship illustrating the intersectionality of multiple influences on practice. This layered and intertwined approach to data generation and interpretation allowed me to critically engage with my social and practice worlds incorporating the tensions and dilemmas of what it means to practice as a teacher and to be human within the academy. The theory of restorative learning (Lange, 2004, 2007) underpins the structure of the thesis, foregrounding the emerging influence of a restored marginalised perspective. The concepts of habitus, field, capital and symbolic violence (Bourdieu, 1973) have been used to think through how these restored perspectives and personal experiences intersect with professional and broader influences in practice. Through autoethnographic exploration insights emerged; the influence of a wounded learner habitus on feedback practice, a renegotiation of a privileged position in the feedback relationship and the development of trickster properties as a device to open up dialogue and reflexive spaces within my own culture in order to develop feedback practice beyond the self. In practice we are rarely encouraged to confront why we think the way we do about ourselves as teachers, particularly in relation to the social, cultural and political world around us. This thesis contributes to the ongoing scholarly conversation concerning influences on professional practice from a practitioner perspective and the role of a layered approach to autoethnography in making these perspectives accessible.

Prior to 1989, in New Zealand, very few women were represented in senior leadership positions in schools, especially co-educational secondary schools. Following the 1989 Education Act, commonly referred to as the 'Tomorrow's Schools' legislation, women began to be appointed in increasing numbers to school principalships. In New Zealand, as in other western democracies where New Right ideologies have impacted on educational policy, the role of the school principal has become more demanding and complex. If principals are to be supported in this role, it is considered important that the knowledge and experiences which influence their professional practice are better understood so that professional development programmes are targeted appropriately. This study builds on previous studies of women's experiences of leadership in education (Neville, 1988; Shakeshaft, 1989, 1995; Strachan, 1991, 1997; Court, 1992; Ozga & Walker, 1995; Hall, 1996; Coleman, 1996, 2000; Ah Nee-Benham & Cooper, 1998; Henderson-Kelly & Pamphilon, 2000; McCarthy, 2001; McLay & Brown, 2001) but has as its focus, the sources of influence on five women principals' practice. It has a complementary focus to McLay's and Brown's (2001) study of women headteachers in UK independent secondary schools. They investigated the women's formal training but also sought to find out what life experiences might have prepared them for the role of leading a school. Ah Nee-Benham's and Cooper's (1998) narratives of minority women in school leadership positions in the United States provided the inspiration for this study of five New Zealand principals. While the women in this study are not 'voices from the margins' as are the women in Ah Nee-Benham's and Cooper's study, through the use of narrative and other qualitative methods, their individual accounts capture the voice of experience which is too often missing from the educational leadership literature (Ah Nee-Benham & Cooper, 1998; Heck & Hallinger, 1999; Southworth, 2001). The women's stories add collectively to an emerging literature base which seeks to unravel how leaders actually think and work. This study specifically examines five women principals' personal theories and beliefs about leadership and investigates how their personal histories and career experiences have influenced their professional knowledge and practice. The research methods reflect a commitment to understanding the women's experiences from their perspectives and their stories are seen as providing a window into what they know. Methods such as concept mapping, open-ended unstructured interviews and annals (snake diagrams) help unpack their personal theories about leadership as well as assist understanding of the influence of their personal histories and professional experiences. The educational leadership literature provides a useful starting point to analyse the first part of the research question regarding the women's conceptions of leadership. The literature acknowledges various approaches to leadership, three of which may be called 'moral/critical', 'people-centred' and 'corporate managerial'. Respectively, they each have 'world-views' which emphasise 'ideals', 'people' and 'efficiency'. In this study, I aim to identify what 'world-views' underpin the women's conceptions of leadership but also how they have constructed these concepts. The different needs of each of their schools in association with the principals' own backgrounds and values systems have strongly influenced their varying conceptions of leadership. While on one level their beliefs are unique, on another, they reveal some common themes. The principals are people-focussed but this commitment is underpinned by deeply held ideals about the purpose of schools enriching lives. Efficient management systems are seen as important supporting concepts to assisting people and accomplishing ideals. In order to answer the second part of the research question regarding how the women's personal histories and professional experiences have influenced their professional knowledge and practice, this study drew on the findings of an Australian study which investigated the sources of influence on teacher knowledge in action (McMeniman, Cumming, Wilson, Stevenson & Sim, 2000). It provided the platform and focus for the current study of women principals. A key finding of this study is that the women's beliefs and practices have been influenced by both their personal histories and various career experiences which have assisted them to grow professionally. Central to their learning from these experiences, however, is the way in which the individual interprets or filters experience and actively constructs meaning. Principals' knowledge bases are socially constructed but mediated by their personal theories. Learning from experiences in the workplace has a critical influence especially if it is scaffolded by experts (Billett, 2001) or if there is a community of practice (Wenger, 1998, 2000) encouraging participation. When this learning is augmented by various research access points (McMeniman et al., 2000) such as critical dialogue with peers, in-service education and formal postgraduate studies, it potentially has a direct and daily influence on principals' practice. Although this study is limited to an analysis of five women principals, the commonalities in the sources of influence on their practice, lead one to suggest that the findings may have relevance for other principals, both male and female, and possibly other practitioners.