This thesis focuses on the course through which romantic relationships gain meaning in the lives of students at the University of Colombo, Sri Lanka. Drawing from research conducted with some students from the university in 2007/08, the thesis illustrates the process of investing in relationships, arguing that romantic relationships feature significantly in their imagination of 'a life that is worthy of living.' The story that is related in this thesis demonstrates that, in the lives of the research participants, romantic relationships provide a cocoon for self-development. Arising out of a need that they described as youthful, the research participants pointed out that romantic relationships are all but a passing phase. While providing a space in which one could fulfil their youthful desires, romantic relationships became a part of the larger plan of life by paving the way for the birth of 'real' love. Being a king of love that lasts, real love provides a formidable base for marital bonds. The stories the search participants told of their love lives suggested that 'real loves' are born when one invests oneself in it, pouring in time, effort, trust and commitment. It is the investment of trust and commitment that makes these bonds last, thus making it a kind of a bond on which a successful marriage could be founded. Investing in building trust and commitment is likened to investing oneself in the relationship, because in doing so, the research participants pointed out that they emerge as men and women of particular natures. The investment of oneself in the relationship is a process that revolves around giving and taking. Drawing out three aspects through which the research participants embedded themselves in romantic relationships, the thesis highlights the relational aspect of self, pointing out that one's life's worthiness could be tied to the people who are around them.

The present study investigates the role of personality as an antecedent factor to jealousy experience and expression utilizing Guerrero and Andersen's (1998) Componential Model of Jealousy Experience and Expression. Whereas personality constructs have been commonly examined as correlates or concomitants of jealousy there has been relatively little empirical work examining the role of personality in the context of this model, which highlights the distinction between jealousy experience and expression. The present study addresses this issue by examining the relation between the components of the model and well-established measures of adult attachment, the Five-Factor Model of personality, and specific maladaptive personality traits in two samples. The first sample is composed of 400 undergraduate students and the second sample is composed of 184 married community residents who have reported experiencing jealousy in their romantic relationships. Additional analyses evaluate the relation between jealousy experience and expression as well as the relation between relationship satisfaction and jealousy. While adult attachment dimensions tend to be the strongest predictors of the elements of jealousy experience and expression, other personality variables exhibited important and meaningful relations as well. The majority of these other personality variables tended to contain elements of negative emotionality at their core. The present study also provided replication of several relations between elements of the componential model of jealousy.

This thesis is a critique of romantic love theoretically premised on the analytical psychology of Carl Jung and the humanistic psychoanalysis of Erich Fromm. The aim of this critique is to explore whether there are grounds for postulating a conception of love beyond the current romantic framework. As the critique is primarily concentrated at the depth level, romantic love is examined via the medium of Cinderella folklore, with particular focus on Andy Tennant's 1998 film adaptation of Cinderella, Ever After. Based on a Jungian approach to the psyche and psychic products, the methodological framework incorporates the three following tools: The tool of interpretation at the subjective level, in which the characters of the Cinderella fairy tale are read symbolically rather than taken to denote literal fictitious characters; the tool of constructive analysis, in which it is argued that romantic love is more than 'nothing but' a boy/girl love story or 'nothing but' a myth depicting patriarchal oppression; and the tool of amplification, in which archetypal similarities between the Christian myth and the Cinderella fairy tale are highlighted. The central argument of this critique is that while romantic love does not provide a viable model of relatedness if taken and practiced literally, the romantic myth nonetheless contains within it the basis for a fuller and richer experience of love and relatedness if read subjectively. The rationale for a depth critique of romantic love is based upon the Jungian postulate that phenomena such as dreams and myths issue fundamentally from the unconscious psychic realm, and further upon Jung's recognition of a psychological developmental process he refers to as 'individuation' activated by engagement with the products of the unconscious. A symbolic/psychological reading of romantic love brings to light that romantic desire toward another is an outward manifestation of an inner desire for individual realisation, and is expressive of the individual's own capacity for wholeness. The value of a symbolic reading of romantic love is appreciated if it is conceived that it is precisely individual realisation that forms the basis for what is referred to by Erich Fromm as productive or knowledge-based love, argued here to be the ideal and only firm basis for human relatedness generally and intimate relatedness specifically.

The present pair of studies tested the hypothesis that romantic investments are reciprocal, such that the investments made by one romantic partner motivate continued investment from the other partner. In Study 1, participants were presented with a hypothetical scenario involving a failing relationship, in which romantic investment was experimentally manipulated. High investments made by a romantic partner predicted continued relationship perseverance. In Study 2, participants in romantic relationships were randomly assigned to recall their own investments,their current partner‘s investments, or skip directly to the dependent measures (control). Participants who recalled their partners‘ investments reported higher intentions to continue to invest in their relationships. This effect was mediated by higher feelings of gratitude toward the partner and by increased feelings of trust in the romantic partner. The role of gratitude in particular suggests prosocial emotions and processes are an important factor in relationship decision making.

The present pair of studies tested the hypothesis that romantic investments are reciprocal, such that the investments made by one romantic partner motivate continued investment from the other partner. In Study 1, participants were presented with a hypothetical scenario involving a failing relationship, in which romantic investment was experimentally manipulated. High investments made by a romantic partner predicted continued relationship perseverance. In Study 2, participants in romantic relationships were randomly assigned to recall their own investments,their current partner‘s investments, or skip directly to the dependent measures (control). Participants who recalled their partners‘ investments reported higher intentions to continue to invest in their relationships. This effect was mediated by higher feelings of gratitude toward the partner and by increased feelings of trust in the romantic partner. The role of gratitude in particular suggests prosocial emotions and processes are an important factor in relationship decision making.

When romantic partners provide support to one another, their attempts are not always successful in relieving the distress of the support recipient. While unsuccessful support transactions are sometimes caused by insufficient skills on the caregiver’s part, research has also shown that certain individuals struggle to feel better regardless of the quality of support that they receive. The overall goal of the present set of studies was to examine how individuals who are inconsolable (i.e., who typically do not feel better when they receive support) impact the self-esteem and relationship satisfaction of their romantic partners, as well as the likelihood that their romantic partners will continue to provide support to them in the future. Study 1 showed that individuals who perceived their romantic partners to be more inconsolable were less likely to be satisfied with their romantic relationships, particularly if they were male, or high in rejection sensitivity. These individuals were also less likely to report engaging in actual support behaviours toward their romantic partners, and in contrast to the finding pertaining to relationship satisfaction, this result was stronger among individuals low in rejection sensitivity. Study 2 showed that when individuals imagined themselves as the support provider in a vignette where the support recipient was inconsolable, they predicted that they would experience lower state self-esteem and romantic relationship satisfaction, and that they would be less likely to provide the partner with support in the future. Conversely, in Study 3 participants who recalled and wrote about a time in which their romantic partner was inconsolable did not predict providing their partners with less support in the future, however, they did report lower state self-esteem, and among individuals who were high in rejection sensitivity, lower relationship satisfaction. Overall, these findings suggest that inconsolable individuals negatively impact the self-esteem and romantic relationship satisfaction of their partners, particularly if their partners are high in rejection sensitivity. Further, inconsolable individuals may also be at risk for receiving less support over time.

The current study examines both attachment style and the current romantic relationship's influence on exploration. A sample was gathered of 152 female and 130 male undergraduate students from Texas A&M University. The study found that attachment styles were related to the participants' perceptions of their partner with regards to exploration. Specifically, avoidant people report using exploration as a means to distance themselves from their partner. Anxious people respond that they are dependant on their partner to explore. In addition, the study found that the Anxiety dimension predicted exploration across a range of established scales from the literature. Finally, the study presents evidence that the degree to which anxious people feel that they explore out of dependency on their partner mediates the association between anxiety and exploration. These findings highlight the importance of accounting for the current relationship partner in future studies of exploration and attachment.

Ending a relationship is a common and often difficult experience for adolescents and young adults who are dating (Furman & Wehner, 1997). Yet, little is known about how romantic relationships deteriorate prior to breakup (Carver, Joyner, & Udry, 2003; Duck, 1981). The main goal of this study is to develop a definition of relationship deterioration that delineates the process of deterioration, by specifying a beginning and end point of deterioration and identifying characteristics that distinguish deterioration from breakup. Data for this study comes from the University of Texas Tracing Relationships and Commitment study (UT-TRAC), which contains 464 participants (232 heterosexual couples) who graphed changes in commitment over a 9-month period providing reasons describing each change. Deterioration, as defined as declines in commitment, was described by both partners in a romantic dyad in 90 couples whereas 75 individuals described deterioration and their romantic partner did not. A coding manual was created and pilot-tested to measure frequency and intensity of the four characteristics of deterioration in participant’s descriptions of changes in commitment. The current investigation used multi-level modeling separately for couples experiencing deterioration (to control for the dyadic nature of the data) and individuals whose partner did not report declines in commitment. Survival analyses using logistic regressions (Singer & Willett, 2003) were applied to measure how the characteristics of deterioration could predict breakup. Results of the analyses revealed that participants who experienced a breakup were more likely to report relationship deterioration, particularly for couples where both individuals described deterioration. Hierarchical linear models revealed that more frequent amounts of the deterioration characteristics was associated with deterioration as compared to pre-deterioration. However, intensity of the characteristics was not significant in differentiating between deterioration and pre-deterioration. In comparing deterioration with breakup, frequency of the deterioration characteristics predicted breakup only in descriptions of alternative partners, whereas intensity of the all four deterioration characteristics predicted breakup ranging from 37% (more intense scores of relational uncertainty) to 74% (more intense scores of alternative partners for an individual’s partner). Implications of this study will be in terms of commitment theory in order to further understand relationship processes. / text

Successfully managing interpersonal relationships requires both pursuing desirable bonds and forgoing those that could be costly. Balancing these goals might be more difficult for some than for others, especially for those with low self-esteem who are motivated to connect, yet stifled by their lack confidence in their abilities to attract desirable dating partners. So, when a potential date’s romantic interest is unambiguous, will they eagerly seize any opportunity to connect, or will the desirability of the person making the request influence their decision? In three laboratory experiments, single, female participants were randomly assigned to receive a romantic overture from an ostensible, single, male who was presented as a desirable or an undesirable dating partner. Independent of whether they accepted or rejected the target’s advances, lower, relative to higher, self-esteem individuals experienced more emotional and cognitive uncertainty and distress before and after making their decision. Desirability of the target moderated some of these effects, such that high self-esteem individuals appropriately distinguished between desirables and undesirables, whereas low self-esteem participants experienced distress at the thought of accepting or rejecting either target. Notably, the actual decisions participants made were unaffected by self-esteem, and driven instead by the extent to which the target was presented as possessing desirable social commodities. Results are discussed with reference to potential mechanisms driving self-esteem differences in balancing the pursuit of quality interpersonal bonds while avoiding costly relations.

Successfully managing interpersonal relationships requires both pursuing desirable bonds and forgoing those that could be costly. Balancing these goals might be more difficult for some than for others, especially for those with low self-esteem who are motivated to connect, yet stifled by their lack confidence in their abilities to attract desirable dating partners. So, when a potential date’s romantic interest is unambiguous, will they eagerly seize any opportunity to connect, or will the desirability of the person making the request influence their decision? In three laboratory experiments, single, female participants were randomly assigned to receive a romantic overture from an ostensible, single, male who was presented as a desirable or an undesirable dating partner. Independent of whether they accepted or rejected the target’s advances, lower, relative to higher, self-esteem individuals experienced more emotional and cognitive uncertainty and distress before and after making their decision. Desirability of the target moderated some of these effects, such that high self-esteem individuals appropriately distinguished between desirables and undesirables, whereas low self-esteem participants experienced distress at the thought of accepting or rejecting either target. Notably, the actual decisions participants made were unaffected by self-esteem, and driven instead by the extent to which the target was presented as possessing desirable social commodities. Results are discussed with reference to potential mechanisms driving self-esteem differences in balancing the pursuit of quality interpersonal bonds while avoiding costly relations.