The purpose of this study has been to investigate the virtual world that people are part of on online dating sites. To do this we have investigated two different research questions, which are the following: What functions do the online dating sites provide? Why and how are the online dating sites being used by their members? In order to gather information about these matters, we have used a qualitative method consisting of participating observation, scrutinizing and single person interviews. Our results indicate that people have different goals with their usage of online dating sites; some are looking for love, a long-term relationship while others are looking for sexual contact. There are many different online dating sites to choose from depending on the users’ objective. The online dating sites we have observed offer similar functions. To find someone of interest most of our interviewees use the search function. The way of initializing contact when finding someone of interest varies between our interviewees, but most of them send flirts and mails. Online dating offers a possible alternative for people to find a potential partner.

La fréquentation des sites de rencontres est désormais une pratique répandue en France et un objet de débat important. À partir d’une recherche empirique originale qui croise des enquêtes qualitatives et quantitatives, cette thèse propose une sociologie de ces services de rencontres sur Internet. Se plaçant d’abord du côté de la production des sites, elle montre la constitution d’un nouveau marché économique – celui de la rencontre – dont elle dissèque les différentes logiques. Elle explique en particulier la forte standardisation des plateformes, et la diffusion plus récente de sites spécialisés, comme autant de dynamiques propres à un marché en développement. Étudiant les usages au sein de la population hétérosexuelle, elle interroge ensuite les modes d’appropriation – sociaux et sexués – des sites et l’organisation des relations qui en découlent. Ce faisant, l’enquête révèle que, si les sites promeuvent les rencontres amoureuses, ils contribuent en réalité peu à la formation des couples, favorisant davantage une hétérosexualité non conjugale. La discrétion des rencontres en ligne, qui se déroulent en dehors et à l’insu des cercles de sociabilité, contribue à ce fait. Alors que les pratiques numériques sont habituellement associées à une publicisation croissante de la vie intime, les sites de rencontres participent donc d’un mouvement contraire de privatisation de la sociabilité sexuelle. Cette caractéristique des sites autorise une plus grande marge de manœuvre dans l’exercice de la sexualité, et ce en premier lieu pour les femmes, mais ne déroge pas pour autant au double standard de sexe qui structure les relations hétérosexuelles, sur Internet comme ailleurs. / Online dating is a widespread phenomenon in France today as well as an important topic of debate. Based on original empirical research, interweaving qualitative and quantitative methods, this thesis offers a sociological understanding of these sites. By first examining the production of dating sites, the thesis shows how a new economic market has been established – the dating market – whose different logics are then analysed. In particular, the high degree of standardisation of these platforms, as well as the more recent spread of specialised sites, are seen as characteristics of a developing market. Dating site use within the heterosexual population is then examined through an analysis of the different modes of appropriation – social and sexual – of the sites, as well as the structure of resulting relations. In so doing, the investigation reveals that although these sites do foster romantic encounters, they seldom result in couple formation, favouring instead a non-conjugal heterosexuality. The privacy afforded by online dating, external and unbeknownst to one’s social circle, contributes to this. Whilst the use of information technologies is typically associated with increasing public exposure of intimate life, dating sites thus have the opposite effect of rendering sexual sociability more private. This characteristic of the sites allows for a larger degree of freedom in the expression of sexuality, particularly for women; however, it does not circumvent the sexual double standard that structures heterosexual relations, on the Internet as elsewhere.

With the capacity to connect millions of singles through the virtual world, online matchmaking has altered the traditional, face-to-face romantic relationship initiation process. Users of online matchmaking sites have easy access to thousands of available singles and can communicate with partners before ever meeting face-to-face. Specific mechanisms by which online matchmaking environments operate are likely to distort both users’ appraisals of other users and users’ appraisals of themselves. This phenomenon in dating has left researchers to speculate about the effectiveness of romantic relationship initiation in such a context, and for relationships that are successfully formed online, whether the effects of online matchmaking extend beyond the relationship initiation process to influence the subsequent progression of romantic relationships. Seventy-five single men and women were recruited and agreed to subscribe to the online matchmaking site Match.com for 30 days. Participants completed measures assessing their individual background characteristics, sociosexual orientation, personality and attachment. In the event that participants scheduled a first date with someone they met through Match.com, they completed pre and post-date measures assessing idealistic distortion of, attention to, and ease of finding alternative dating partners. Upon completion of their 30 days in the study, participants completed a follow-up questionnaire assessing the degree to which they idealistically distorted themselves to other users and their overall satisfaction and experience using Match.com. Logistic regression analyses revealed that the more users’ distorted the vitality and attractiveness of dating partners the less likely users were to experience a second date initiated by the dating partner. Future studies need to consider that traditional models of relationship initiation are out-dated and not applicable to the study of relationship initiation and progression in the context of online matchmaking. Relationship researchers need to investigate: gender differences in filtering potential partners, the function of filtering in such a context, the developmental progression of filtering and the subsequent potential heightened importance of physical attraction verses the importance of compatibility in predicting relationship initiation in the online matchmaking environment. Additionally, future research should involve comparisons of various matchmaking services’, should utilize larger sample sizes and should follow participants for a longer period of time. / text