Extra-marital affairs are the main reason for divorce in western society. Pastoral therapists usually operate within a modernistic theology and use their 'expert' knowledge of theological ethics to confront the unfaithful spouse - a pastoral therapeutic approach that neither delivers the desired results, nor honours the client's expertise and freedom. This study endeavoured to socially construct pastoral therapy using the principles of postmodernistic social construction discourse with couples/spouses where one spouse is or was engaged in an extramarital affair. The relation between a modernistic epistemology and a postmodernistic epistemology, and how this relation affects theology, practical theology and pastoral therapy were explored. The propium of pastoral therapy in a postmodemistic paradigm and the implications of a narrative approach in pastoral therapy for theological ethics were reflected upon. A narrative description of extra-marital affairs was constructed and some of the cultural discourses which co-constitute extra-marital affairs were discussed. The pastoral therapist and clients were simultaneously in conversation with ethical discourses and relational, personal and emotional discourses, thus co-constructing new alternatives and possibilities. During these multiple reflexive conversations, some of the cultural discourses (eros; self-fulfilment; extra-marital sex and hedonism) which co-constitute extra-marital affairs were deconstructed. In the light of the usual limitations of the life-span of an extra-marital affair, the pastoral therapist and faithful spouses socially constructed alternatives and possibilities for their lives to enable them to outstay the extra-marital affair of the unfaithful spouse. Multiple reflexive conversations with (un)faithful spouses co-constructed, with relational and ethical discourses, a narrative approach in pastoral therapy. The use of externalisation and ritualisation in a narrative approach in pastoral therapy concerning extra-marital affairs was explored. A sense of guilt and secrets were also themes in multiple reflexive conversations with unfaithful spouses. This prompted reflection on the use of Scripture in a narrative approach in pastoral therapy. The relation between the biological-psychological aspects of extra-marital affairs and narrative therapy are also briefly explored. / Philosophy, Practical & Systematic Theology / D. Th. (Practical Theology)

Extra-marital affairs are the main reason for divorce in western society. Pastoral therapists usually operate within a modernistic theology and use their 'expert' knowledge of theological ethics to confront the unfaithful spouse - a pastoral therapeutic approach that neither delivers the desired results, nor honours the client's expertise and freedom. This study endeavoured to socially construct pastoral therapy using the principles of postmodernistic social construction discourse with couples/spouses where one spouse is or was engaged in an extramarital affair. The relation between a modernistic epistemology and a postmodernistic epistemology, and how this relation affects theology, practical theology and pastoral therapy were explored. The propium of pastoral therapy in a postmodemistic paradigm and the implications of a narrative approach in pastoral therapy for theological ethics were reflected upon. A narrative description of extra-marital affairs was constructed and some of the cultural discourses which co-constitute extra-marital affairs were discussed. The pastoral therapist and clients were simultaneously in conversation with ethical discourses and relational, personal and emotional discourses, thus co-constructing new alternatives and possibilities. During these multiple reflexive conversations, some of the cultural discourses (eros; self-fulfilment; extra-marital sex and hedonism) which co-constitute extra-marital affairs were deconstructed. In the light of the usual limitations of the life-span of an extra-marital affair, the pastoral therapist and faithful spouses socially constructed alternatives and possibilities for their lives to enable them to outstay the extra-marital affair of the unfaithful spouse. Multiple reflexive conversations with (un)faithful spouses co-constructed, with relational and ethical discourses, a narrative approach in pastoral therapy. The use of externalisation and ritualisation in a narrative approach in pastoral therapy concerning extra-marital affairs was explored. A sense of guilt and secrets were also themes in multiple reflexive conversations with unfaithful spouses. This prompted reflection on the use of Scripture in a narrative approach in pastoral therapy. The relation between the biological-psychological aspects of extra-marital affairs and narrative therapy are also briefly explored. / Philosophy, Practical and Systematic Theology / D. Th. (Practical Theology)

Text in Afrikaans / Die Wetenskap filosofiese en prakties teologiese posisionering word deur 'n postmoderne benadering bepaal. Met die doel van die studie naamlik, dekonstruksie van die teologiese diskoers, liefde, in die oog, volg 'n blik op kwalitatiewe navorsing. Sosiale konstruksie diskoers word as epistemologiese vertrekpunt bespreek. Metodologies het die keuse op 'n narratiewe benadering geval. Voortvloeiend hieruit volg die gebruik van metafore, eksternalisering en dekonstruksie van die gesprekke. Die doel van die studie vereis ook bestudering van verskeie sienings oor liefde. Die literatuurstudie word bespreek onder die volgende metafore, naamlik algemene sienings, 'n historiese oorsig en teologiese sienings. Die relevansie van die gekose inligting word weerspieel in die gesprekke. Met behulp van veelvuldige reflekterende gesprekke word saam met gesinne gekonstrueer aan 'n nuwe verstaan van liefde. / Both the Scientific Philosophical and the practical theological positioning are determined by a postmodemistic approach. Keeping in mind the aim of this study, namely the deconstruction of the theological discourse, iove, a view on qualitative research is given. A review of social construction discourse as epistemological starting point is given. Methodologically a narrative approach was used. Emanating from this follows the use of metaphors, externalization and deconstruction of the interviews. The aim of this study also demands the study of various views on love. The study is arranged under the following metaphors, namely general views, a historic review and theological views. The relevance of the chosen information is reflected in the interviews, and new understanding of love is constructed in collaboration with the families. / M.Th.(Practical theology)

Text in Afrikaans / Die Wetenskap filosofiese en prakties teologiese posisionering word deur 'n postmoderne benadering bepaal. Met die doel van die studie naamlik, dekonstruksie van die teologiese diskoers, liefde, in die oog, volg 'n blik op kwalitatiewe navorsing. Sosiale konstruksie diskoers word as epistemologiese vertrekpunt bespreek. Metodologies het die keuse op 'n narratiewe benadering geval. Voortvloeiend hieruit volg die gebruik van metafore, eksternalisering en dekonstruksie van die gesprekke. Die doel van die studie vereis ook bestudering van verskeie sienings oor liefde. Die literatuurstudie word bespreek onder die volgende metafore, naamlik algemene sienings, 'n historiese oorsig en teologiese sienings. Die relevansie van die gekose inligting word weerspieel in die gesprekke. Met behulp van veelvuldige reflekterende gesprekke word saam met gesinne gekonstrueer aan 'n nuwe verstaan van liefde. / Both the Scientific Philosophical and the practical theological positioning are determined by a postmodemistic approach. Keeping in mind the aim of this study, namely the deconstruction of the theological discourse, iove, a view on qualitative research is given. A review of social construction discourse as epistemological starting point is given. Methodologically a narrative approach was used. Emanating from this follows the use of metaphors, externalization and deconstruction of the interviews. The aim of this study also demands the study of various views on love. The study is arranged under the following metaphors, namely general views, a historic review and theological views. The relevance of the chosen information is reflected in the interviews, and new understanding of love is constructed in collaboration with the families. / M.Th.(Practical theology)